My TrÍBe- My Energy
That’s my tribe, my squad! How often have you heard this comment? I have a million times. I have used it myself personally, not knowing what it implied in the literal sense.
Well, let’s define a tribe in simple words. My people, my sense of camaraderie, my buddy’s, and someone who will often say, Like You-Me Too! They tolerate your quirks and idiosyncrasies but, at the same time, will candidly point out your mistakes. Now, does that mean they are not supportive? Absolutely not; they are only watching out for you. Fragile line, but once we understand this, our sense of tribe will get strengthened.
I banged my head against the wall a million times. Lost sleep, went through some crazy low moments, self-pity mode, only trying to understand where I fit in? Do I even have a tribe to back on? It took me an insane amount of time to figure this out.
I have never believed in having one best friend.
So boring. Well, for some folks, they may feel that’s not the case. They feel the security and comfort blanket with the exclusivity; however, it never worked in my case.
Friendship is all about freedom. Its when you can say that, I think you are wrong. It’s about not following someone blindly.
The click. The connect. The mutual understanding. The acceptance.
That’s what matters.
My eyes constantly looked around for that one fastening bridge trying to complete the equation, fill in the blank spaces. Looked high and low to find that core person who I could resonate with deeply. I always wondered why do I have to tweak myself to find my place. I wanted to be comfortable with who I am and nurture relationships in accordance to that- the right fit. Scan the concordant lock and key. A harmonious sweet-sounding mellifluous tribe I belonged to. No judgments whatsoever- just be ME! The well-tuned euphonic energy.
I tiptoed around- hopped like a crazy bunny. I always felt nerdy with the cool kids, intellectual with the happy go lucky ones, sober for the party freaks, spiritual for the unrealistic, poker-faced for the ever-smiling ones, and most of all, I faked myself to fit into the wrong-sized shoes, hoping to get the sense of belonging.
Guess what? Never happened- till it dawned on me, who am I chasing? I was the odd duck trying to swim against the currents only to be swept away.
Now don’t get me wrong. We all have our soft spots where we find solace- creature comforts where we feel wanted, and the sense of well being prevails. My sense of tribe was missing- what was wrong? I wanted my core back- my most prized possession. My energy got lost somewhere in the dust. I was frantically dashing in the mirage- the illusory me!
My energy. My heartbeat. My Magic. My light. My blanket-fort.
I spoke my truth and hung on tight with myself. I smiled in the confusion.
Dr. Seuss said- Why fit in when you were born to stand out!
And the magic moment happened- I found My TrÍBe- My Energy in ME!